Sharing and Modeling Values
Everyone comes to the mentor/student relationship valuing certain behaviors and ideals.
As individuals, we are aware of some but not all of our values. As a first step, mentors should, themselves, recognize the values which are most important to them.
Students’ values may be different from those of mentors. Awareness, tolerance, and respect for the values of others is basic to establishing a successful mentoring relationship. Mentors can encourage students to clarify their own values and establish goals which are consistent with them.
What does a mentor do when values differ so much that the mentor cannot, in good conscience, let the student think that he/she agrees with or condones these values?
If this sharing is accomplished without imposing values upon the youth, it can have a positive and lasting effect upon the youth and the relationship.
How does the mentor address differences in social status, economic background, race, and other real differences between mentor and student? Sometimes socio-economic or racial differences can raise particularly difficult problems for a developing relationship. Sometimes when mentor and student are of the same race, it is assumed that the mentor knows what the student’s values are; yet, because of other differences (e.g., economic class, religion, family background, education), the mentor and student will actually have very differing values. The aforementioned differences between mentor and student provide them with a wide landscape to investigate and use to learn about one another.